Last night as I was heading to Taco Mac to meet my friend Theresa, "Touch, Feel & Lose" by Ryan Adams came on and I think it is the first time I really listened to the lyrics. I guess you can tell by now that I am someone who really related song lyrics to things going on in my own life. Well, look at the gem below...
"Touch, Feel & Lose"
Ryan Adams
I knew I was never gonna talk to you tomorrow
And oh, the birds how they sing
If you were a bird could you sing me a song of sorrow
'Cause all I know from you is grief
But I never wanted to be your rolling train
I never wanted to be your dancin' shoes
I just wanted you to love me
I just wanted you to love me
Touch, feel & lose
And cry, cry, cry
I thought maybe I could be some kind of shelter
But oh, your storm how it raged
You know your kisses, they like lightnin' and thunder
And your smile is sweet and come down like rain
I never wanted to be your dancin' shoes
I just wanted you to love me
I just wanted you to love me
Touch, feel & lose
And cry, cry, cry
I just wanted you to love me, honey
Cry, cry, cry
By the way, this is a fantastic song and as Ryan Adams always does, he hits right to my heart. And as for the T Mac, fantastic night and it was great catching up with a friend!
Video from You Tube
Lyrics from
Monday, May 23, 2011
Soul Searching
I have been doing a lot of soul searching the last week on what I really want out of life. Why I can't get this one man out of my mind, but yet know that it is never going to be anything or work out the way I want.
How can this man not fall in love with me the way I fell in love with him? He has even told me that he has a fantastic time with me, loves spending time with me - then what is it? I had never been with someone that made my brain tick so much, the laughter, let's not even discuss the physical - wowza. And he agreed with me - so why don't you want to be in a relationship with me? It seriously boggles the mind.
So then I decide I just need to take all of the good things that have come out of the whole thing. Who knew that making someone happy would make me so happy? Who knew that I would want to give everything I have to someone and then figure out a way to give more? The light bulb has finally gone off in my head of why I was never able to take a relationship to the next level - I was never open to it. I have always been such a private person, but I finally let someone in.
A wise friend told me this weekend "Once someone shows you who they really all, choose to believe it" or something similar to that. The thing is, I view J as a man that has so much love to give but refuses to allow himself to give it. The whole thing makes me sad on so many levels.
Anyway, I know this is a completely downer post, but it makes it feel better to get it out. And yes, I know I need to move on and my feelings aren't as strong as they use to be - I know things are not going to change. I just try to remember that if this wasn't the one, the next one is going to be that much better.
How can this man not fall in love with me the way I fell in love with him? He has even told me that he has a fantastic time with me, loves spending time with me - then what is it? I had never been with someone that made my brain tick so much, the laughter, let's not even discuss the physical - wowza. And he agreed with me - so why don't you want to be in a relationship with me? It seriously boggles the mind.
So then I decide I just need to take all of the good things that have come out of the whole thing. Who knew that making someone happy would make me so happy? Who knew that I would want to give everything I have to someone and then figure out a way to give more? The light bulb has finally gone off in my head of why I was never able to take a relationship to the next level - I was never open to it. I have always been such a private person, but I finally let someone in.
A wise friend told me this weekend "Once someone shows you who they really all, choose to believe it" or something similar to that. The thing is, I view J as a man that has so much love to give but refuses to allow himself to give it. The whole thing makes me sad on so many levels.
Anyway, I know this is a completely downer post, but it makes it feel better to get it out. And yes, I know I need to move on and my feelings aren't as strong as they use to be - I know things are not going to change. I just try to remember that if this wasn't the one, the next one is going to be that much better.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Delusional Women - Even Adele has her issues
Just read this great article courtesy of Celebitcy on Adele that is in the new issue of Out Magazine.
She still loves her ex even though he dumped her and most likely has the same delusions of him coming back to her because she felt they were soulmates.
Read the article here - Adele in Out Magazine via Celebitchy
She still loves her ex even though he dumped her and most likely has the same delusions of him coming back to her because she felt they were soulmates.
Read the article here - Adele in Out Magazine via Celebitchy
Monday, May 16, 2011
Thursday, May 12, 2011
File this under Bad Ideas
So I am meeting up with John tomorrow (at least we are suppose to meet up) for some cocktails after the office to catch up. Yes, this was my idea because I basically need to know if I really do want to continue a 'friendship' with him or if I should just cut it off completely.
Currently I have decided that this will be my theme song for tomorrow:
I Look So Good (Without You)
By Jessie James
Full Lyrics:
Hey boy, I would have thought that
When you left me I'd be broken
With my confidence gone, so gone
Hey boy, I would have thought that
When you said that you don't want me
I'd feel ugly and sense something was wrong
Standing in front of the mirror
My skins never been clearer
My smiles never been whiter
I look so good without you
Got me a new hair due
Looking fresh and brand new
Since you said that we were through
Done with your lies
Baby, now my tears dry
You can see my brown eyes
Ever since you said goodbye
I look so good
I look so good without you
I look so good
I look so good without you
Hey, I never would have thought that
When you left me I'd feel sexy
And so good in my skin again
And I never would have known that
I'd be dreaming so much better
Without you in my head
Standing in front of the mirror
My clothes never fit better
My, but I've never been louder
I look so good without you
Got me a new hair due
Looking fresh and brand new
Since you said that we were through
Done with your lies
Baby, now my tears dry
You can see my brown eyes
Ever since you said goodbye
I look so good
I look so good without you
I look so good
I look so good without you
Now baby, my body's looking better than before
Ain't biting my nails since you walked out of the door
I realize now I deserve so much more than what you give
Than what you give
I look so good without you
Got me a new hair due
Looking fresh and brand new
Since you said that we were through
Done with your lies
Baby, now my tears dry
You can see my brown eyes
Ever since you said goodbye
Of course I will be giving you an update at what went down at the meeting and how I am feeling after! At least I know I do look damn good since I have been without him! thanks 20lbs gone and I really did get a new hair do!
Lyrics from: eLyrics
Video from: You Tube
Currently I have decided that this will be my theme song for tomorrow:
I Look So Good (Without You)
By Jessie James
Full Lyrics:
Hey boy, I would have thought that
When you left me I'd be broken
With my confidence gone, so gone
Hey boy, I would have thought that
When you said that you don't want me
I'd feel ugly and sense something was wrong
Standing in front of the mirror
My skins never been clearer
My smiles never been whiter
I look so good without you
Got me a new hair due
Looking fresh and brand new
Since you said that we were through
Done with your lies
Baby, now my tears dry
You can see my brown eyes
Ever since you said goodbye
I look so good
I look so good without you
I look so good
I look so good without you
Hey, I never would have thought that
When you left me I'd feel sexy
And so good in my skin again
And I never would have known that
I'd be dreaming so much better
Without you in my head
Standing in front of the mirror
My clothes never fit better
My, but I've never been louder
I look so good without you
Got me a new hair due
Looking fresh and brand new
Since you said that we were through
Done with your lies
Baby, now my tears dry
You can see my brown eyes
Ever since you said goodbye
I look so good
I look so good without you
I look so good
I look so good without you
Now baby, my body's looking better than before
Ain't biting my nails since you walked out of the door
I realize now I deserve so much more than what you give
Than what you give
I look so good without you
Got me a new hair due
Looking fresh and brand new
Since you said that we were through
Done with your lies
Baby, now my tears dry
You can see my brown eyes
Ever since you said goodbye
Of course I will be giving you an update at what went down at the meeting and how I am feeling after! At least I know I do look damn good since I have been without him! thanks 20lbs gone and I really did get a new hair do!
Lyrics from: eLyrics
Video from: You Tube
Currently Listening To...
The Beauty Of Who You Are
Mark Broussard
This is how I want the man I am with to feel about me. Obviously there are men out there that are in touch with themselves enough to feel this way - bring it on baby!
Full Lyrics:
There's a soft sweet space on the back of your neck
Smells like rain
There's a way you look at me baby
Heals my pain
I've studied every inch of your body
Baby what's on your mind
The touch of your skin just pulls me in
Every single time
There's a silent conversation
Filled with hidden revelations in your eyes
[Chorus]
Baby I'm so into you
Every whisper from your soul to my heart
Baby I know its true
You're a sweet little mystery sent to me from the stars
And that's the beauty of who you are
There's a faith you're savin' for a rainy day
I could use right now
There's a way you move my soul to sing
Only you know how
You are a sensual salvation
You're the holiest temptation
Baby I'm never, never, never gonna be the same
[Chorus]
I can't explain it or begin to conceive
All I know is that you make me believe
[Chorus]
Lyrics from Sing 365
Video from You Tube
Mark Broussard
This is how I want the man I am with to feel about me. Obviously there are men out there that are in touch with themselves enough to feel this way - bring it on baby!
Full Lyrics:
There's a soft sweet space on the back of your neck
Smells like rain
There's a way you look at me baby
Heals my pain
I've studied every inch of your body
Baby what's on your mind
The touch of your skin just pulls me in
Every single time
There's a silent conversation
Filled with hidden revelations in your eyes
[Chorus]
Baby I'm so into you
Every whisper from your soul to my heart
Baby I know its true
You're a sweet little mystery sent to me from the stars
And that's the beauty of who you are
There's a faith you're savin' for a rainy day
I could use right now
There's a way you move my soul to sing
Only you know how
You are a sensual salvation
You're the holiest temptation
Baby I'm never, never, never gonna be the same
[Chorus]
I can't explain it or begin to conceive
All I know is that you make me believe
[Chorus]
Lyrics from Sing 365
Video from You Tube
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Currently Listening To...
At My Most Beautiful
REM
One of my all time favorite REM songs, this was on the album 'UP,' by I first discovered it on the movie soundtrack for 'Never Been Kissed.' I am a diehard early REM fan but this is definitely one of their best later tracks. The lyrics are fantastic.
Full Lyrics:
"At My Most Beautiful"
I've found a way to make you smile
I've found a way
A way to make you smile
I read bad poetry
Into your machine.
I save your messages
Just to hear your voice.
You always listen carefully
To awkward rhymes.
You always say your name,
Like I wouldn't know it's you,
At your most beautiful.
I've found a way to make you smile
I've found a way
A way to make you smile
At my most beautiful
I count your eyelashes, secretly.
With every one, whisper I love you.
I let you sleep.
I know you're closed eye watching me,
Listening.
I though I saw a smile.
I've found a way to make you smile
I've found a way
A way to make you smile
Lyrics from AZ lyrics
Video from You Tube
REM
One of my all time favorite REM songs, this was on the album 'UP,' by I first discovered it on the movie soundtrack for 'Never Been Kissed.' I am a diehard early REM fan but this is definitely one of their best later tracks. The lyrics are fantastic.
Full Lyrics:
"At My Most Beautiful"
I've found a way to make you smile
I've found a way
A way to make you smile
I read bad poetry
Into your machine.
I save your messages
Just to hear your voice.
You always listen carefully
To awkward rhymes.
You always say your name,
Like I wouldn't know it's you,
At your most beautiful.
I've found a way to make you smile
I've found a way
A way to make you smile
At my most beautiful
I count your eyelashes, secretly.
With every one, whisper I love you.
I let you sleep.
I know you're closed eye watching me,
Listening.
I though I saw a smile.
I've found a way to make you smile
I've found a way
A way to make you smile
Lyrics from AZ lyrics
Video from You Tube
Monday, May 9, 2011
Advice to Follow
LADIES: If he misses you he would tell you. If he really wants you he will say it. And if he actually cares he will show it.
Friday, May 6, 2011
Status Update
I don't know if I have PMS or if this is just the lack of physical intimacy that I have had lately, but I have really been thinking a lot about John this week. We do remain friendly and text each other during the week and I think maybe we did a little too much this week.
This leaves me asking myself these questions to which I really don't think I will ever know the answers:
Does he miss me at all?
Did he ever find me attractive?
What did he think when he saw me a couple of weeks ago?
Should we get together to catch up?
I wonder if we did get together if he would be wanting to hook up?
I do know that we all have times when we reflect back on old relationships and miss the times we shared with that person. I guess this week is that for me. I just hate to feel like I moved forward so much in the last couple of months to only go back to wishing he would ask me for a second chance. At that point I have to ask myself if that is so I can decline and feel like I have the upper hand or if I really want him still.
All I know is that I need to remember that I was the one who cut it off. I knew when I made the line in the sand that he wouldn't cross it and I did it because I know that I deserve better than what I was receiving.
Currently chanting: Upward and Onward girl!
Tonight I am going to go to John's Creek so I can support my dad at the Relay for Life. For the last 3 years, my father has selflessly given his time and skills to setting up the entertainment portion of the John's Creek Relay For Life. I am so proud of him and can't wait to lend my support. This year my mom was unable to help with the planning but she is currently there working her tail off as well. Kudos to both of my parents!
If you would like to donate to the John's Creek Relay for life: Click Here
Not in the John's Creek area? Here is a link to the main Relay for Life site:
Click Here
This leaves me asking myself these questions to which I really don't think I will ever know the answers:
Does he miss me at all?
Did he ever find me attractive?
What did he think when he saw me a couple of weeks ago?
Should we get together to catch up?
I wonder if we did get together if he would be wanting to hook up?
I do know that we all have times when we reflect back on old relationships and miss the times we shared with that person. I guess this week is that for me. I just hate to feel like I moved forward so much in the last couple of months to only go back to wishing he would ask me for a second chance. At that point I have to ask myself if that is so I can decline and feel like I have the upper hand or if I really want him still.
All I know is that I need to remember that I was the one who cut it off. I knew when I made the line in the sand that he wouldn't cross it and I did it because I know that I deserve better than what I was receiving.
Currently chanting: Upward and Onward girl!
Tonight I am going to go to John's Creek so I can support my dad at the Relay for Life. For the last 3 years, my father has selflessly given his time and skills to setting up the entertainment portion of the John's Creek Relay For Life. I am so proud of him and can't wait to lend my support. This year my mom was unable to help with the planning but she is currently there working her tail off as well. Kudos to both of my parents!
If you would like to donate to the John's Creek Relay for life: Click Here
Not in the John's Creek area? Here is a link to the main Relay for Life site:
Click Here
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Status Update
So obviously I haven't been writing as much since I apparently have really moved on. Not that I still don't miss some of the fun times - I can barely remember a time when we were together and we weren't laughing or just enjoying the company. But hey, there are tons of fun things going on this summer and I am ready to enjoy them all.
Prado Beer Festival was tons of fun this past weekend with Sarah and we did end up heading to the Tilted Kilt to watch the UFC fights - that was pretty interesting.
Inman Park Festival on Sunday was a monetary black hole for me, but I love all of the purchases I made and wouldn't take any of them back.
I am really looking forward to a little bit of rest this weekend as I gear up for my favorite beer fest - Dunwoody on the 14th. That one is always tons of fun, though this year we will be missing the entertainment of Yacht Rock. Hopefully the band they have playing will be just as amusing though without the Love Boat uniforms, I will hold my judgement!
Prado Beer Festival was tons of fun this past weekend with Sarah and we did end up heading to the Tilted Kilt to watch the UFC fights - that was pretty interesting.
Inman Park Festival on Sunday was a monetary black hole for me, but I love all of the purchases I made and wouldn't take any of them back.
I am really looking forward to a little bit of rest this weekend as I gear up for my favorite beer fest - Dunwoody on the 14th. That one is always tons of fun, though this year we will be missing the entertainment of Yacht Rock. Hopefully the band they have playing will be just as amusing though without the Love Boat uniforms, I will hold my judgement!
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